Greg Loves Warrick
by juneprota
Summary: *SLASH* Greg is minutes away from ending his and Warrick's relationship when the other man is injured in a car accident. GregWarrick. *COMPLETE*
1. it's the end of the world

**Greg Loves Warrick**

_01. it's the end of the world_

When it comes to resolving his problems with Rick, it's always tomorrow. He'll bring it up tomorrow. He'll break it off tomorrow. Well, tomorrow is finally today. Because Greg doesn't think he can go through another tomorrow with things the way they are today. A guy's got to have a little self-respect.

Yeah, he loves Warrick. Greg can say that objectively. He loves Warrick, and that probably isn't going to change anytime soon. But, Warrick doesn't love him in return, and that probably isn't going to change anytime soon either. Greg loves Warrick. Warrick doesn't love Greg. What's Greg to do? Greg's to break it off, because he doesn't want to be one of those people that stays in a relationship constantly hoping…hoping things will change while waiting for the other shoe to drop. He doesn't want to force Warrick to fall in love with him or trap him into some kind of commitment.

So, yeah, Greg loves Warrick, but he loves himself more.

He has it all planned out. He'll take Warrick to breakfast after shift, and just tell him. He'll tell Warrick that things aren't working out, tell him that he needs more, tell him that it's over. And Greg knows it's stupid, but he's hoping Warrick won't let him end it, that he cares enough about their relationship to fight for it. But, Greg's prepared for the worst, prepared for Warrick to give up on them. He hopes he is at least.

XXXXXXXXXX

Greg's getting ready to pick Warrick up when he gets the call. It's Nick. There's been an accident. Warrick's hurt. He's at Desert Palms and they're not sure he's going to pull through. And in a moment, Greg feels his world ending. He rushes to the hospital. Within a few minutes he decides he fucking hates hospitals. They won't tell him anything. He can't see Warrick. He's not family. Nick's picking up Grams from the other side of town.

Grissom's already at the hospital and he looks a little shaken. Greg doesn't bother speaking to his boss though. He doesn't want to and he doubts Gris would be receptive to small talk. He takes a seat a few chairs down and bends over, putting his head in his hands, trying to slow his breathing.

He can't think about losing Warrick right now. He loves Warrick too much for him to die. Yeah, he'd been planning on ending things with Warrick, but he'd also been counting on seeing the other man everyday at work until one of them retired. And he'd been hoping that maybe in a few months or years Warrick would come knocking at his door. Yeah, Greg never wants to be one of those people constantly hoping, but when it comes to Warrick, he seems to be full of hope. First he's hoping that Warrick won't let Greg dump him, then he's hoping that if they do break up Warrick will want him back, and now he's just hoping Warrick will live.

Greg doesn't care what happens, as long as Warrick is alive. He can deal with anything else that's thrown his way. He just needs Warrick.

XXXXXXXXXX

Nick finally returns to the hospital with Grams. Nick goes off to find a doctor, while Grams comes straight for him. She sits down next to Greg and wraps him in her arms. "You poor boy." Greg wants to bring his head to her chest and just cry. But, he won't let himself do that. "He's gonna be fine, Grams."

He and Warrick have been dating for almost a year and a half now. Greg's known Grams almost as long, and there are some weeks when he talks to her more often than her grandson. Greg doesn't have any family in Vegas and she's filled that void willingly, wholeheartedly.

Three heads look up when Nick walks into the waiting room with a doctor. They stand near the doorway talking briefly before the doctor walks away. Nick moves to stand in front of him, Gil, and Grams and repeats what the doctor told him. "Rick's gonna be okay. They…uh…they say his back was injured during the accident. His spinal cord. He can't feel anything below his waist. They don't know if it's permanent. They're talking about taking him into surgery to relieve the pressure on his cord. The sooner they do it, the better his chances are. They say we can go in and see him if we want. One at a time."

Greg is the last to go into the small room. He doubts he would have recognized his boyfriend if it weren't for the "W. Brown" scrawled on the chart at the foot of his bed. Warrick's face is one large bruise. Greg steps closer to Warrick and tries to give him a smile. "Hey there, big guy." Greg watches as Warrick lifts his hand and meets him halfway, taking his boyfriend's hand in his. Warrick runs his thumb in circles across the back of Greg's hand, something he used to do a lot when they first started dating, a sign that he was about to start a serious conversation with Greg.

"They told you..."

Greg takes a deep breath. "Yeah, I know. But after the operation...it'll take some time but you'll be good as new."

"You know that's not true." Warrick closes his eyes in frustration. "God, Greg. Without my legs I can't do my job." He opens his eyes to look at Greg, before dropping his gaze to their joined hands. "I can't...I can't even make love to you."

"Hey, hey. Don't...I'll take you any way I can get you." Greg sits down in the hard plastic chair next to Warrick's bed. "When Nick called…I'm just so glad you're alive. You don't know...I don't know what I would've--"

"I love you, Greg."

"You love me?" Greg wants to believe it. He wants to so badly. He wants them to be a normal couple that loves each other and isn't afraid to show it and say it. But they aren't. Getting Warrick to show any kind of normal, genuine affection for him has always been like pulling teeth. Warrick does it so rarely, Greg is hesitant to believe him when he does. And now, after a car accident, possible paralysis, and being pumped full of morphine for the pain, Warrick decides to declare his love for the first time.

Warrick gives him a pained version of his usual wide smile. "I said it, didn't I?"

"Yeah. You did." And Greg's taking everything Warrick says at this point with a grain of salt. He's done getting his heart broken.

Greg turns to the door when he hears a doctor walk in. "We need to prep Mr. Brown for surgery."

Greg nods and stands up. He leans over to brush a soft kiss against Warrick's swollen lips. "You already know how I feel about you. I love you, Rick. I'll be here when you get out of surgery."


	2. as we know it

**Greg Loves Warrick**

_02. as we know it_

Greg walks into the rehabilitation center with a cup of coffee in his hand. He's already been up for eighteen hours and this is his reward for a hard day, seeing Warrick. He sees Warrick nearly everyday, more often than he did before this, when they were just dating. On the few days he can't visit Rick because of work, he makes sure that Grams or Nick stop by. He figures no one should go a day without seeing a friendly face. The people at the center are friendly enough, but they aren't Warrick's friends.

When Greg walks into Warrick's room he sees Nick sitting across from Warrick in his wheel chair. He immediately turns around to leave and give them a little space. "I'll be back."

As the door swings shut, he can hear Nick say, "man, you're so lucky you've got someone like Greg." He doesn't think Warrick should feel lucky. Greg's the lucky one. Warrick's alive and well, mostly. And more than that, Warrick's letting Greg be there for him, for the first time he can remember. Warrick's been at the rehabilitation center for the last eleven weeks. He only has one more week to go before he can be moved back home as an out patient. In the last few months, Warrick's regained sensation in his legs. He's lost a little motor control, he gets weak fast, and he's been having some muscle spasms. But Greg can only think it's all a great improvement from where Warrick was not so long ago. Warrick's getting better. That's all that matters to him right now.

Nick walks out of the room and gives Greg a pat on the back. "He's all yours G. Did you get any sleep?"

Greg lies. "Yeah, a couple hours." Greg spent all his time between shift and now moving Warrick's stuff over to his place. Warrick lives in a third story apartment. It isn't handicap accessible.

He knows Warrick will be tired tonight. His visits with Nick always tire him out. For some reason Warrick feels he has to keep things light with Nick. He never talks about his injury or how he's feeling. He tells jokes and talks about sports. And it's all stupid, as far as Greg was concerned. Because at least once a week, Nick corners him and asks how Warrick is really doing.

Warrick is doing about as well as could be expected for someone in his position. Warrick was active, he had a physically demanding job. And now he is looking at the possibility of losing a job he loves and never doing the things he once enjoyed. Physically, Warrick is recovering. Emotionally...

Well, Greg suspects that he's seeing a psychologist for depression. Warrick won't talk about it with him. But Greg knows it's part of the treatment at the rehabilitation center.

Greg plasters a smile on his face before walking into the room. It turns genuine when he sees the corners of Warrick's mouth turn up. "Hey there, handsome."

Warrick's smile is gone and Greg could hit himself. His boyfriend's been sensitive about any compliments on his looks since the accident. After the swelling and bruising went down, he was left with three scars on the left side of his face. Two small ones on his forehead and jaw. A bigger one against his cheek. Warrick will always be handsome though. If anything, the scars make him look just a little less pretty and a little more dangerous, sexy. Greg has a feeling Warrick isn't ready to hear that, so he continues, ignoring his slip. "So how was your visit with Nick?" He moves to sit in the chair across from Warrick.

"It was fine."

"That's good."

"Aren't you going to kiss me hello?"

Greg barely stops himself from rolling his eyes. Greg knows how this will end and it won't be pretty. He stands up only to lean over and give Warrick a peck on the lips. Warrick deepens the kiss before he can pull away. He considers putting an end to the kiss, but knows now isn't the time to reject Warrick and it's not like he hasn't missed kissing his boyfriend.

Minutes later, Warrick pulls away in frustration, breathing a little heavily. What would usually come out as a normal request, comes instead as a hopeful, but hesitant plea. "Could you...uh, sit on my lap?"

He knows how hard it has to be for his boyfriend to ask, but he doesn't want him to get his hopes up, only to be disappointed. "Warrick..."

"Please, Greg."

He straddles Warrick's lap, his legs fitting unfamiliarly against the wheel chair. It was Warrick's favorite position before...

And it is doing nothing for him now. Greg knows what Warrick is waiting for. And Greg is hoping with all his heart that it will happen, not for himself, but for Warrick. He understands it to a certain extent. Warrick was a lot of things, a CSI, a musician, a casual athlete, an amazing lover. And right now he's looking at the possibility of not being any of these things anymore. He can't make love, can't do his job, can't play basketball or baseball, can't play piano, something Greg never thought about until Warrick pointed out that he'd never be able to coordinate his feet to use the pedals.

And now Warrick feels like less of a man because he can't get it up. Greg understans that, but he in no way thinks it is true. It is still early in his recovery. Warrick is trying too hard. And even if it doesn't happen...if Warrick is forced to take supplements...or if it just never happens, Greg will be okay with that. There's more than one way to make love. And Greg can explain all that until he's blue in the face, and Warrick won't get it.

When Warrick pulls away, Greg's lips travel to his jaw, his neck, planting soft kisses. Warrick isn't touching him anymore, his hands have fallen from his back. His body is a little more rigid. Warrick pulls away from one of Greg's kisses. "That isn't working."

"I'm not doing it to get you hard. I'm doing it because I want to. I miss you." Greg pulls back to look Warrick in the eye. "I love you."

Warrick kisses him in response. He hasn't said "I love you" since that day in the hospital months ago. Greg isn't too surprised though. He always thought that admission had more to do with the strong drugs being pumped through his system than actual feelings.

"I think I want to go to bed now."

"Okay." Greg helps him move from the wheelchair to the bed. Warrick takes off his shirt and Greg helps with his pants. Warrick gets settled in the bed and Greg stands beside it, unsure of what to do, stay or leave.

"You could rest beside me for awhile if you want. I'll set the alarm so you don't miss work."

"Thanks." Greg starts stripping down to his boxers. "I don't have work tonight though."

"Then why don't you go home and get some real rest?"

"I want to be with you."

Greg turns off the light and gets into bed beside Warrick. He rests his head against Warrick's shoulder and his arm across Warrick's chest. He closes his eyes and pretends he doesn't hear Warrick's quiet response "I don't know why," because he isn't sure of the answer either.


	3. i feel fine

**Greg Loves Warrick**

_03. i feel fine_

Greg stands at the door as he watches Warrick wheel himself up the ramp he had installed last week. Since leaving the rehabilitation center, Warrick has been adamant about doing everything on his own. Greg understands Warrick's pride. He isn't going to fight him on it.

Warrick makes it through the door and Greg shuts the door behind him. "Welcome home."

"This isn't home." Warrick says it under his breath. Greg can hear the edge to it. He considers responding but ignores the urge before walking by Warrick and flopping on the couch. He's been dealing with his boyfriend...ex-boyfriend...Warrick's surly attitude for the last three hours as they checked out of the rehabilitation center and drove back to Greg's place. Greg is tired.

He watches Warrick wheel around the front rooms to look around at the changes Greg had made to make the place more accessible.

"I haven't been here in a long time." Warrick says it softly to himself. It's loud enough for Greg to hear though. It's true. When they were dating, they never spent time at Greg's place. Warrick never took the initiative to visit Greg. They were always meeting at Warrick's place. Or if they went out, Warrick would always want to go back to his own place so he didn't have to drive back to his before his next shift.

Greg sits up when Warrick wheels around in front of the couch. "You know, I never thanked you for all of this."

"You know you don't need to thank me."

"Yeah. I do. I know we were never ready to move into together...and you doing all this for me. It means a lot."

Warrick had never been ready for them to move into together. Greg had been ready ages ago. In all those months he imagined sharing his space with Rick, he never thought it would be under these circumstances. "Even though it's completely unnecessary, you're welcome." Greg leans forward, placing his hand on Warrick's knee, making eye-contact."You never have to thank me. I love you. You know I'd do anything for you."

Warrick's expression shifts. Greg catches a flicker of...something. Before he can put a name to is, Warrick has already closed himself off again.. "Yeah, I do."

"War--"

"I'm getting a little tired, Greg. I think I'm just gonna go to bed."

By the time Greg remembers to say "Goodnight," Warrick's already wheeling away from him.


	4. orange crush

**Greg Loves Warrick**

_04. orange crush_

Greg wonders sometimes, wonders what goes on in Warrick's head.

The thing is...Warrick must care about him. They wouldn't be together otherwise. Before the accident, Warrick could have had anyone. And Greg didn't do too bad for himself either. They were together for a reason, multiple reasons. It's at times like this that Greg can't remember one of them.

Greg's been driving around for an hour now and he still hasn't come to a decision. To distract himself he tries to remember all of the reasons he and Warrick are together. The sex was phenomenal. They don't speak everyday, but before the accident, there wasn't a day they missed out on sex. And when they do speak...despite all of their differences, he and Warrick have a lot in common. They feel the same way about family, about life. They both believe in living every day to the fullest. They feel the same about work - its a second, third, maybe fourth priority. Never first. They both rather have fun today than worry about tomorrow.

Greg can't help but smiling as he remembers all of the reasons he loves GregandWarrick as a couple. But all of those memories are from before the accident and this is after the accident. And after-the-accident GregandWarrick is a train wreck. While they both view a lot of things similarly, Greg thinks the biggest problem is that they view relationships very differently. And Greg knew that going into the relationship.

It can be boiled down to where they're from. Southern California and Las Vegas. Greg isn't a hippie, his parents aren't hippies. His parents are barely liberal. But Greg does believe. He thinks this might be a Californian characteristic. Greg believes in people. He believes that love means something. He believes that part of loving someone is being willing to do anything for them while asking for nothing in return. The act of love is giving a piece of yourself. Greg loves and he knows he deserves to be loved in return. Greg would never intentionally hurt someone he loved and he would never expect to be intentionally hurt by someone that loved him.

Warrick on the other hand expects to be fucked over. In Vegas you don't get anything without giving something first. And with his odd jobs in high school and college, running for the casinos...Warrick had the type of "friends" that would stab you in the back to get ahead. Warrick doesn't trust easily. Sure, Greg knows Warrick would trust him with his life on the job. But Warrick will never trust him not to leave for something better. And because he doesn't trust, he never just lets go in a relationship. Warrick will never be the guy that loses himself in love. Greg can practically see Warrick calculating how much he owes Greg for this or that, calculating how much of himself he has to give to make Greg happy.

And despite how smart Warrick is, his calculations are way off.

Greg doesn't know what to do. Maybe Warrick has been right all along - love cannot conquer all.

He's at the same place he was so many months ago. He loves Warrick, wants to be with him, wants to care for him, just wants to...love him. But Warrick won't let him, won't let him in. Greg gets pieces and parts of Warrick, never the whole. It just makes him physically sick. He wants it so much.

Greg remembers the arguement clearly. "I'm here for you. I want to be here for you. How long is it going to take you to figure that out?" Greg had brought his hand to Warrick's cheek and those green eyes looking into his almost stopped him. But Warrick looked away. A dismissal. "I can't wait anymore. I can't wait for you to figure it out, Rick." Greg had backed away. "I've gotta go." He nearly ran out of his own apartment.

Greg picks up his cell phone and calls Nick. "Hey...uh, Nick. I gotta ask a huge favor. Rick has physical therapy in a couple hours. I was hoping you could take him. I'm not at the apartment now. I'm..uh...we're kind of taking a little break. I'm staying at a hotel."

Greg hears Nick groan. "Ah, what'd that idiot do now?" He hears Nick moving around as if he's getting ready and grumbling. "I told him to get his shit together." Nick's voice is suddenly clearer. "Don't worry about it. Don't worry about Rick. Take care of yourself."

"Will do, sir." Greg hangs up the phone and looks for a hotel.


	5. happy shiny people

**Greg Loves Warrick**

_05. happy shiny people_

Greg avoids his own apartment for a week. He keeps his conversations with Nick at work completely professional. It's killing him. He wants to make sure Warrick is going to his appointments and taking his meds. He wants to know how Rick's physical therapy is progressing and if he's getting enough sleep. He wants to know if Warrick…misses him. And it's stupid. Greg knows it's stupid. He wants to bang his head against a locker for how stupid it is. Greg cannot stop loving Warrick. He can't make his brain and heart and soul stop. He tries. Again and again, he tries.

He can't avoid his apartment for much longer though. He needs clothes and can't pay the cost of a hotel room for the rest of his life. Greg promises himself he'll go back to his place after work. The one day he doesn't want his shift to end, it seems to fly by. He leaves the lab saying goodbye to Nick and Sara. He walks through the parking lot toward his car, and when he looks up, there is Warrick, leaning against the driver's side door. There is no escaping him.

Greg looks around for a wheel chair or crutches or...they aren't around. "You're standing."

Warrick lets out a short laugh, "barely."

Greg looks more closely and can see the tight set to Warrick's mouth that conveys the strain he's putting himself through to stand in front of Greg. "Jesus, Warrick, this is what I'm talking about." Greg runs his hand through his hair. "Why the hell would you put yourself through this just to stand in front of me. I don't know if you just don't care about your own health or if your too proud..." Greg trails off. He begins again, more calmly. "Where's your wheelchair? or your crutches?" He looks around again as if they will suddenly appear.

Warrick grabs Greg's wrist. "Greg, wait...fuck, I suck at this. I'm not trying to prove anything. I just wanted to surprise you." Warrick shifts his stance. "Greg, I know I fucked up. I fucked up way before the accident. I fucked up in the hospital. I fucked up after the accident. But I do love you. I love you more than I've ever loved anyone else."

Greg stalls. "Do you need to sit down?"

"Umm..." Warrick looks around.

Greg points to the car. "We should sit." He walks around and opens the passenger side door for Warrick. He goes around to the other side and gets in. He waits for Warrick to shut his door before beginning. "I don't believe you."

"You don't believe I love you?"

"Warrick, the circumstances under which you said it for the first time--"

"Bullshit. I know I never say it. I'll never say it as often as you like. I'm not that guy. But deep down, you know how I feel about you Greg. You know everything about me. I refuse to believe you don't know this."

Greg knows. He's always known.

Warrick takes an audible breath. "Granted, we have a lot of issues. _I_ have a lot of issues. None of those issues are love though. We both love each other."

Greg nods and gives a half smile that's more like a grimace. "Yeah, we do. But the issues? Maybe I can't deal with them?" And therein lies the problem. The problem isn't all of their problems. Every relationship has problems. The problem is Greg isn't sure he can deal with them all anymore. He doesn't know how to fix them. He's not sure it's worth it anymore.

"Maybe you can't."

"Goddamnit Warr--"

"Warrick's Issue #1: I give up too easily." Warrick meets Greg's eyes and smiles. "This is what I'm giving you, Greg. I can't promise everything will work out. I can't promise things will change. I can promise we'll work on it together. I promise you'll never be alone in this again. You won't be the only one wanting us to be together."

Warrick leans over the console and cups Greg's cheek in his palm. "Come on, babe, one more chance. That's all I'm asking."

The problem is Greg loves Warrick and he's never been able to say no. "One more chance." Warrick leans in for a kiss and as he's pulling away Greg asks, "do you really have a list of your issues?"

"Yes, yes I do. I have a list of yours too."

Greg feigns indignation. "I have issues?!"

Warrick's lips have moved on to Greg's jaw. "Yup. Your list is almost as long as mine."

"What's my number one issue?"

Warrick's lips move up to Greg's ear. "Greg's Issue #1: He loves Warrick."

The End

* * *

Thanks to fictitiousshore, dreamer22, and inumoon3 for reviewing!


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